I was just flipping through a notebook I sometimes take with me, in case inspiration strikes or I finally develop a consistent writing practice! I live in hope…
Anyhow, I found this little poem on one of the pages:
Help me
I’m drowning
Powerless and weak
Who was I, I wonder?
Who am I meant to be?
Please, won’t someone love me, and show me how to be?
How to breathe for myself
And believe in myself
I can’t stand this any longer
I must break free
What’s it all for, anyway?
All this suffering and pain…
In my darkest moments, I somehow sense that an alternative reality is waiting for me.
Calling to me
Even longing for me
That final line is the bit that got to me. The idea that life is always calling to us to be the best and happiest versions of ourselves is one that really comforts and reassures me, and it’s something I’ve experienced on many occasions. When I choose to see something through the eyes of love, rather than fear, or choose to show up as my true self, I often get the feeling that there’s this invisible force cheering me on; encouraging me to keep walking, slowly but surely, along the path of self-acceptance and self-expression.
Looking back, even when I was much younger and in the midst of much teenage angst and anguish, I was also having these sorts of conversations between myself and the universe. I had a strong sense, despite feeling utterly terrified and unworthy, that I mattered. That my life was somehow important, and that in spite of everything, everything was sort of OK. Because we do matter, don’t we? And things do have a funny way of working themselves out, don’t they? It’s just a quiet whisper that we hear sometimes, in moments of peace, maybe when we’re out in nature or relaxing under a beautiful night sky. Then the noise of our lives creeps back in and fear tells us to stop being so whimsical: “Pull your socks up and get on with it, otherwise you’ll never get anywhere in life and people will judge you for your inadequacies”.
So what does the quiet voice of love say to you in those quiet, peaceful moments? And what can I say to reassure you that you matter, and are 100% worthy in every moment of every day?
By for now fellow human beings x